A candid, no holds barred look at those screwy college nicknames. You know the ones. Hoyas, Tar Heels. Yeah. Those ones.

Friday, March 12, 2004

The University of Idaho has the Vandals, New York University has the Violets, Sweet Briar College has the Vixens, and the University of Akron has the Zips. Those are at least worth an honorable mention. Pacific University has the Boxers, which makes me think of boxer shorts, until you realize it's just a cuter name for a bulldog.

As a resident of Oregon, I cannot, in all good conscience, have a blog such as this without mentioning the University of Oregon Ducks. Ducks. How is that supposed to intimidate another team? Has anyone lately been mauled by a duck. I know it's a Northwest animal, but for pete's sake, there are bears and mountain lions here. It's not like all of the good names were taken by other schools in the state (Oregon State Beavers). It's bad enough to have a wimpy nickname like Ducks, but then they used a symbol ripped off from Walt Disney of Donald Duck.


Yeah, they tried to make him look tough, but what do you expect from a mascot that doesn't wear pants?

Fortunately, they've made amends by:
a) coming up with a much better symbol:



b) finding a meaner duck:


and c) getting cool looking helmets:

Go Ducks!

Wednesday, March 10, 2004

Utah's college teams have plenty of identity problems. The University of Utah is (are?) the Utes. What the *#$% is a Ute? I guess it's some sort of Native American. Gee, let's see….how many Native Americans are left in Utah now? Compared to Mormons? It doesn't even look right when you see it print: Utah Utes. It looks like a typo that the spell checker didn’t catch. And Utah State isn't much better: The Aggies. Oooooh, now I'm frightened. I can just imagine their opponents before the big game:
"Yeah, we're going up against the Aggies tonight."
"Aggies. Yeah, that reminds me – I need to call my grandma after the game."

Have you ever looked at Southern Utah University's mascot, the T-Bird?:



Did you look at it. Ok. Now, is it me, or does SUU need to add a zoology class to its curriculum? Isn't that an eagle? Looks like an eagle to me.

Jeez, I guess if you just add a bolt of lightning to any old bird you can have a "Thunderbird."
Plus, SUU plays in the Mid-Continent Conference. Eh? Mid-continent?. That's kind of generic. You just have to be located somewhere in between the edges of the continent to be included? (Another team in the Mid-Continent Conference is IUPUI, but that's a whole 'nother story!)

Tuesday, March 09, 2004



Hey, is this a cool mascot, or what? The Richmond Spiders. I like it. It's different, it's dangerous, it's edgy. Go Spiders!